Spring Clean your Relationships

It’s time to Spring Clean our Relationships.  I hope you’re making progress on Spring Cleaning your Goals & Dreams, your Technology and your Time! I know I’m getting a lot of cleaning done by doing this series. I hope you are as well.

There are so many directions we could go in this post but I don’t have space to cover everything. Today I want to focus on how you are doing with investing in your close relationships?

If I were answering that question I would probably off the top of my head say, of course, I am.  But if I stopped and thought about what was going on in the relationships with my kids and spouse  I’d have to change my answer.

Here are some questions I might ask myself:

1.  Is my husband getting the best part of me or is he getting just the stale leftovers?
2. What is my mood like when I’m around him? Am I irritated with him or happy to see him?
3. Am I complaining about him more than I am grateful?
4. Are my kids driving me CRAZY all the time?  (YES, your kids will drive you nuts at times but that shouldn’t be the norm).  Identify what drives you crazy?
5. Are there any times of enjoyment?  If so when?
6. Would my kids say they have a happy mom or a stressed-out mom?
7. How do you feel about yourself?  Do you feel like you screw up all the time?
8. How do you feel about yourself?  Do you feel like you screw up all the time?
9. Are you taking time each day for self-care and focusing on your Daily Wins?

Now I realize some of you could walk away feeling very beat up after reading these questions. I know at times my answers would all be on the negative side if I’m completely honest.  My goal isn’t to make you feel guilty but to help you see where you really are at with your relationships.  Remember, we’re doing some spring cleaning. We can get so busy and go through the motions that we aren’t even aware of how we feel or even how we are coming across to others?

One of the greatest lessons I have ever learned in life in relationships is to be a “good finder”.  What is a good finder? It is when you purposely find the good in other people.

I purposely seek to find the “good things” about that person (everyone has them) and then write them down.

Writing them down is a very important step.  When you write them down you are reprogramming your brain.  You are forcing your brain to stop thinking about the bad irritating things and changing it to see the good.  In an article here, it says “The act of writing helps you clarify your thoughts, remember things better, and reach your goals more surely.”  Isn’t that exactly what we need, to clarify our thoughts and remember the good things?

Sometimes it’s hard when you’re in frustration mode to find those good things, but they are there.

Even if you only find one thing, write it down.   You might have to carry that piece of paper around with you for a few days but I can guarantee you that your thoughts will change towards that person.  When we focus on how our husband does this grrr… or my kid is driving me crazy, etc., that is exactly what we’ll see.

But when we look for the good in someone else our focus changes and we can see the good in them.

Try it, I think it will make a huge difference in your life.

 Here is a worksheet that will help you process some of these questions.

 You can download the worksheet by clicking HERE:

I hope that you found some tools that help you Spring Clean your Relationships.

Please leave me a comment and let me know if this has helped you in any way?

Make Sure You Check Out These Other Spring Clean Your Life Posts:

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