A woman who fulfills her “wifely duties” out of obligation does not produce a sexually fulfilled husband. That would be like a husband handing his wife a dozen roses on their anniversary and saying, “I didn’t really want to get you these roses, seems like a waste of good money to me. But I read somewhere that I’m supposed to do something like this because it’s our anniversary. Hope you enjoy them.”
Would you enjoy such a presentation? I’d throw those babies right in the trash with the potato peelings and coffee grounds. And yet, that’s how many women approach sex.
A man can tell when his wife is participating out of obligation and when she is enjoying loving her man. And even though he may feel some release when the song is sung with his obliging wife, he will still feel a hollow void in his heart of hearts.
Let me share one of the secret desires that the survey respondents mentioned when I interviewed men for my book,. Men dream of having their wives initiate sex more often. Notice I said, more often. Some of you are trying to remember if you’ve ever initiated sex, so imagine the joy on his face when you try it the first time.
But what will he think of me? you wonder. Will he think I’m a wanton sex crazed woman? He might hope that’s what you are, but he won’t think that. He might be utterly confused at your sudden desire, but one message will come across loud and clear. “She wants me! She wants me!”
You know what he’ll feel. He will feel like his dreams have come true. I’m not suggesting that a man wants his wife to initiate sex every time. That isn’t the natural order of things.God created man to be the aggressor and woman to be the recipient. Even our bodies are crafted for such. Men are hunters and women are gatherers. But I can promise you that every man likes to feel hunted and captured by the woman of his dreams. Source
Here are some more really good articles to inspire you:
Have More Sex with your Husband Start Tonight by Inspired Truth
Why Sex is so Important to your Husband by Barbara Rainey
If you have been sexually abused in your past this can hinder your satisfaction in sexual intimacy and cause great frustration and more hurt. “The Wounded Heart” by Dan Allender is a great book on sexual healing.
These websites also have a lot of great resources in the area of sexual intimacy.
Focus on the Family
I hope I’ve inspired you to work, grow, and enjoy your relationship in this area. It is a gift from God.
If you missed any of my challenges you can find them below. Remember, you can do these challenges all year long not just at Valentine’s Day. It takes work to make a GREAT marriage!
Be My Valentine Challenge: Verbally Praising your Husband